>>god: lester, rise from your grave? >>lester: i'm sleepy, what do you want? >>god: the time to redeem your self has come.do this final task and live in heaven for eternity. >>lester: what exactly am i supposed to do? >>god: help lavender williams. she will beunder-taking a very dangerous journey. >>lester: wait. lavender williams you said?that little monster, i'd rather be dead. >>god: you are dead, you idiot. >>lester: i will burn in hell before i helpher.
>>god: so be it. >>lester: okay, i'll help. i will. >>god: now that's the answer i want. >>lester: i shall >>god: language. >>speaker1: dear lavender, happy birthday.on my eighth birthday, my father read me these words. you have brains ... >>mom: you have brains in your head, you havefeet in your shoes, you can stir yourself any direction you choose. you're on yourown and you know what you know. you are the one will decide where to go. remember thesewords, sweetheart. they will make all the
difference. love, dad. >>lavender: why can't i see dad? >>mom: it's complicated honey. >>lavender: it isn't complicated, it'syour fault. >>mom: honey ... (cough) lavender ... (cough) >>lavender: the doctor is coming. >>speaker 2: mrs. williams? >>lavender: she doesn't live here. >>mom: go back to your room.
>>lavender: i don't want to. >>mom: go back to your room. please go. >>speaker 2: my name is mr. carcenoma.you may call me cancer. >>speaker 3: you're not crying. >>lavender: what's there to cry about? >>speaker 3: you should. my aunt and uncledied in an accident 30 years ago. he came and took my cousin, mike. never saw him again.sheriff murdstone, the dread sheriff of calabas county. they say, he roams the lonely countryroads in his old car, collecting orphan kids.
>>lavender: i'm not an orphan. i have adad. dear dad, i'm coming your way. now thatmom is dead, we can finally be together. you'll like me very much. you'll see. i don'teat much and i have a wonderful conversation. maybe i'll be there before this letter arrives.love, lavender. >>lester: i hate that. only too sure thingsin this life. death & fleas. >>lavender: lester? >>lester: in the flesh. yeah. are we thereyet? are we ever going to get there? >>lester: are we there yet? are we ever going to get there? (coughing, gasping) >>lavender: stop following me.
>>lester: bury my bones if i could. unfortunately,i got to sent to watch over you. we're in this together lady. >>lavender: you're my guardian angel? >>lester: ha. an irony, isn't it? >>lavender: an irony? a tragedy. >>lester: listen girly, you don't like meand i don't like you. fine, but if i don't babysit you, i'll spend eternity in hell.frankly, i'd rather spend the day asleep surrounded by milk bones and sexy french poodles.so, break it up. you're my only door to heaven. do we understand each other?
>>lavender: i don't need a guardian angeland i don't need you. leave me alone. >>god: lester. >>lester: yes? >>god: where do you think you're going? >>lester: on to meet some cute poodles. >>god: move your butt back there, she'sin danger. >>lester: i'm not listening. i'm not listening. >>god: oh, come on lester. you're betterthan this. she's just a little girl and she needs you.
>>sheriff: you need a ride, sweetheart? >>sheriff: get in here you lil orphan ... agghh ... >>lavender: you. >>lester: 1928, good year. very tender meal. >>lavender: thanks for helping me back there. >>lester: you told me to go away. >>lavender: why didn't you bite him or something?aren't you my guardian angel? >>lester: can't bite anyone. if i hurt someone,i go straight to hell. >>lavender: you can't bite? you bitten me.
>>lester: you hide at covering mist. >>lavender: i'm a kid, kid's play. >>lester: i'm a dog, dog's bite. (background talking) >>lester: you got that looked after, did you?by a doctor? it didn't hurt too much, did it? >>lavender: no. >>lester: it didn't hurt me either, thatmuch. i'm sorry i bitten you. >>lavender: sorry i pulled your ears.
>>lester: it wasn't your fault. i was abad dog. i bit my best friend. >>lavender: when you are gone, i didn'thave anyone else to play with. >>lester: what about your mama? >>lavender: she left. >>lester: your dad? >>lavender: i've never met him. what ifhe doesn't like me? >>lester: are you crazy? he'll love you,kid. oh, bones. you ain't going to cry, are you? >>lavender: i'm not.
>>lester: okay. no time for puppy love, anold manner, remember? >>sheriff: hello, hon. get in. >>lavender: let me out. lester, help me.why didn't you bite him or something? >>lester: if i hurt someone, i will go straightto hell. >>lavender: he left me, like mom. >>sheriff: you're ready to go, sweetheart?now don't you worry, there are whole lot of kids down there, just like you. you'regoing to love this place. you're going to fit right here. (laughs) >>lester: sorry, but the girl is with me.
>>sheriff: ahh. >>lavender: ahh. >>lester: lavender, get out quick. >>sheriff: you orphan, you are to me. >>lavender: i'm not an orphan. >>sheriff: you little brat, get back in here,you little brat. >>lester: i'll take you to a place you'lllike very much. you'll fit right here. >>lavender: lester. >>lester: go. follow the river, kid. you'vegot a dad to find.
any direction you choose. you're on yourown ... >>lavender: you lied to me. i hate you. >>mom: dear lavender, please don't hateme. i did what i did because i love you, more than you'll ever know. you needed a fatherso badly. always remember, you have brains in your head, you have feet in your shoes,you can stir yourself any direction you choose. you're on your own and you know what youknow. you are the one will decide where to go. i didn't leave you, lavender. i hadto go. but i'll be watching over you from heaven, forever. you'll never be alone.love, mom. i'm always with you. lavender original (completed 09/28/13) page1 of 6
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